I want to write, but I can't seem to get any words out.  It's still so new!  The tears role off slower than they did the first week, but hit me at unusual times.  I'm waiting for this cruel joke to be over.  I want to see people, but I don't want to talk most of the time.  I don't want the world to pass me by, but I don't feel like running after it!  I can't wait for the memorial, yet I'm terrified of it.  I would gladly give my life for one more minute with Denise.  60 seconds............that's all I would need to..........I don't know?  Relive the last 5 years.